My experience....in a nutshell. My weight was never an issue until I was sexually abused at a hospital prior to surgery as a child, later I was molested as a teenager, as an adult I was raped. As a result I have had serious 'Body Issues' when I was thin I was HURT, when I was FAT I was SAFE, it was my protection, my insulation and shield from Pain. Yo Yo dieting has been my life... I want my Life back and I would love for you to come along for the journey...
Thursday, July 21, 2011
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
Feeling soo depressed but my boyfriend, (with a smokin' body and a beautiful six pack), convinced me to just "don't think, just do it" I shut-up and pushed play and of course I am so grateful I did. It was "SUPER challenging mentally" but just gave myself a break, how nice for a change... Super sore but a bit happier.
Monday, July 18, 2011
Chest and Back w/out, took every thing I had to finally do it but feel like I am heading in the right direction. Thank you God, literally, when I get off track I do it 100%. Really trying to practice what I preach about Loving myself and no more beating myself up, so happy that I overcame my desire to sleep. Hitting a patch of depression where all I want to do is sleep, but deteremined to regain my health. Trying to give myself a break.....Plyo tomorrow. :o)
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Tough plyo w/out but felt Great to be back at it. Clean day of eaing as well-- BIG yay!! Decided to try and ease into things this week. So exhausted from beating myself up, really trying to "Love" myself as much as I Love my friends. Surely I would not beat up on them as I do myself. * Gotta love & appreciate the little bumps in the road that give you pause. Thanks for all the support, it really helped get me off my booty this am, really! :o)
Monday, July 11, 2011
Omgosh.......been on a horrible downward spiral due to an "Extremely Stressful" situation that is way beyond my control, exactly 20 pds. worth! WOW!!! I can not mention what is happening because the courts are inloved unfortunately. Though now I feel AWFUL, mentally, physcially and emotionally. I can not have anymore excuses!!!!!!! this is ridiculous!! I am so frustrated at myself but am SUPER excited to start P90X tom. am. I have been drinking (which i usually do 3x's a yr) and eating to help deal with the horrible pain of this situation and it has gotten me no where but in MORE Pain, DUH!! sooooo Tuesday is a New Day!!! I am SOOOO very tired and worn out from this drama but also want to meet my goals so I can be done with this weight issue FOR GOOD!!! :o)
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